When Your Gut Knows Better Than Your Brain

Most of us are taught to think our way through life’s hardest moments. Weigh the pros and cons. Make the rational choice. But what happens when loss strips away everything you thought you knew about yourself?

Lisa Jackson faced this exact reckoning after losing her husband of 35 years, followed by the deaths of her sister and father within months. The logical part of her brain kept asking the same question on repeat: What’s the point? She tried everything searching for solid ground — gong baths, cold-water swimming, comfort food binges, and intermittent crying sessions. But none of it quieted the noise or restored her to who she used to be.

Then something shifted. Instead of listening to what her mind insisted she should do, Jackson started tuning into what her body was telling her. When faced with any decision, no matter how small, she stopped asking what made logical sense and started asking what made her compass shine. Did her chest open or contract? Did energy rise or drain away? What gave her goosebumps? This wasn’t mystical thinking — it was a return to a deeper kind of knowing that existed underneath all the shoulds and supposed-tos.

That simple practice became her map through grief’s wilderness. It led her to fire a predatory financial adviser who’d been draining her resources. It helped her recognize a trustworthy tiler when she needed one. It gave her permission to leave friendships that were pulling her down instead of lifting her up. And it carried her across the finish line of a marathon, carrying a pouch of her husband’s ashes.

Grief hasn’t disappeared from Jackson’s life — it’s still there, a solid circle at the center. But something else has grown around it. Something wider and brighter. Not because she forced herself to move on or convinced her mind that everything would be okay, but because she finally learned to listen to the one part of her that never stopped knowing what was true.

The lesson here isn’t that grief goes away. It’s that sometimes the only way forward is to stop thinking so hard and start feeling more deeply.